Another story about me......"Deep and Wide"

From Excitement To Dispair


I woke up excited on a beautiful day looking forward to what was about to happen. For several weeks I had been working very hard writing a march for the Arkansas State College band in Jonesboro, Arkansas. 

When I arrived at the band room the band director, Donald Minx was standing at the door with a big smile on his face. He had told me the day before that we could start out the band rehearsal with my music. I was excited just thinking about the fact that the best college band in the south was about to play my music.

As the band students gathered we passed out the music, and everybody was happy and talking about how neatly the music was written.

Mr. Minx called the band to order and handed me the baton. He instructed me to go ahead and direct the band in my new march. The name of the march was GO BIG RED.

I had taken great pain to make sure that all the parts were written in the proper key and comfortable range for each musician, and they did an amazing job the very first time we went through it. At the end of the march all 120 band students stood to their feet clapping their hands giving me an standing ovation. Mr Minx sent for the other music teachers to come and listen to the march. He called the dean of music and sent one of the students to get a tape recorder.

As we were waiting for the teachers he asked me to direct the band one more time in preparation the teachers and the recording.

After the teachers arrived the tape recorder was turned on and the music started. It was almost like being in Heaven as I listened to my music played by those awesome music majors from Arkansas State University. All that hard work from those sleepless nights was worth it as I was able to hear with my ears what had only been in my mind for several months. Once again there was a standing ovation, and as I looked around I saw tears in the eyes of several teachers and students.

That evening I called my high school band director, Perry Hope in Pine Bluff, Arkansas and played the recording of the march to him over the telephone. Mr. Hope broke down and cried. I also started crying as he told me that he always knew that I had unlimited ability in the field of music. Mr. Hope was a hero in my life, and I really looked up to him.

After the phone call, I went to my bedroom with the tape recorder and listened to the march about fifty times before I went to sleep.

The next day I went to college, and all day long I looked forward to going home and listening to my march again. I rushed home after my last class and ran into my bedroom. When I turned the tape recorder on all I could hear was the voice of a little girl singing "Deep and wide deep and wide there's a fountain flowing deep and wide..."

Then I started having a panic attack. No matter how hard I tried to hear that march, there was no march on that tape to be found. Brenda had gone into my bedroom during the day and pressed the record button. Oh how angry I was. With a broken heart I went to my father and told him that Brenda had ruined my life. I told him how she had destroyed everything I had worked so hard for and had replaced it with "Deep And Wide."

Ren and Bren

The only thing dad had to say was, "Well son, there is a fountain flowing deep and wide."

Brenda is still alive today because of that fountain flowing deep and wide.

I still love you Bren. Hallelujah anyhow. :)

Ren Rutledge